Thinking About What Matters
As we enter the strangest holiday season in recent memory, we’re seeing many of our cherished traditions and travel plans fall away. But are sacrifices made in the spirit of helping others through responsible social distancing really something to regret? In a sense, a crisis like a national pandemic forces us to pay attention to what truly matters… Nobody can tell you what really matters to you, but setting clear, unassailable priorities is the path to both success and happiness on your terms. When it comes to test prep, coaching matters. In college admissions, what matters is mostly what you’d expect. But what matters most in your life? That’s up to you to decide…
Your Goals: Give Up or Go Up?
Face facts… you simply can’t do everything. You can do many many amazing things, especially of you’ve mastered the secrets of time management. But you can’t do everything. So if you want to fulfill your most meaningful goals, prioritize relentlessly. Once we take a hard look at our priorities, we can sort our goals so we devote enough time and commitment to achieving them. We can and should also enlist help, since success is usually a group effort. But does every type of goal benefit from social support? Consider two types of goals: Give-Up Goals define success through subtraction: e.g. less goofing off, weight loss, bad habit cessation Go-Up Goals define success through addition: e.g. better grades, muscle gain, good habit development Conventional wisdom suggests that we should always share our give-up goals, as others are usually very helpful in encouraging us to drop bad habits. But more aspirational goals…
What You Plan Gets Done
One important habit school teaches us–or is supposed to teach–is write down assignments and test dates. Your school may have even provided planners to foster this habit. Some of us revel in creating color-coded plans; others, well, not so much. Simple or artful, we learn to track our responsibilities and manage our time. When life becomes more complex with AP workloads, leadership roles, and after-school practices, a student should use a planner to make it all work. And once the “getting into college” tasks of test prep, college search, and essay drafts kicks in, the whole process can become overwhelming. At times like these, consider the old adage, “If you plan it, it gets done.” What should planning look like for busy high school and college students? Look critically at your current commitments and prioritize them. Define clear goals for your top priorities. Research shows that people who write down…
How to Prioritize When Everything Feels Important
Everyone knows that setting priorities is a necessary skill to manage stress, but deciding which priorities to tend to when everything feels important can bring more stress. Instead of succumbing to procrastination or anxiety, try these five steps to determine what really matters in your life in order to get the ball rolling now: 1. Make a list Write down every goal you want to accomplish. Think about long-term goals as well as short-term goals. Include goals from every aspect of life including education, work, family, and social goals. 2. Assess the value of each goal on your list This step requires an understanding of the big picture. Discern what is most valuable by thinking about the end result of each goal. Start with long-term goals first and rate each goal based on the value you associate with completing each goal. 3. Work backwards Start with the number one…
Prep and Priorities
Meet Rory, a bright, motivated high school junior who can definitely see himself as a doctor (or lawyer or professor or CEO…) someday. Rory, a three-sport athlete and AP student, has made the most of his school experience so far in an effort to present as an outstanding applicant to any college. Aware of the considerable benefits of prepping for the SAT & ACT early in junior year, Rory and his family begin tutoring in September with an eye on the December exams… Junior year these days demands far more of teenagers than most adults realize. Ambitious students don’t just take on advanced classes but also juggle a slew of activities in which they must show commitment, leadership, and excellence. Extracurriculars can be particularly stressful during pressure points in a season, especially when coaches demand absolute acquiescence to uncertain practice schedules. While Rory was excited about preparing for the SAT…
Stressed? Redefine Success!
The last two years of high school are typically when students begin focusing on their future, though this process seems to begin earlier and earlier. Teenagers begin to dream of their ultimate college and start buckling down with standardized test prep while balancing extracurricular activities, volunteering, sports, jobs, and whatever else they deem important to getting into Dream School U. Having worked closely with teenagers over the last seven years, I hear more often than not: “I am SO stressed!” Teenage Millennials put more pressure on themselves than any other generation, and most of their stress is self-induced. They have their eyes on the future and the future holds no room for failure. But, we all know that success is often achieved because of the lessons learned during failed attempts. It becomes important, then, to have a conversation about what success means and how successful people deal with failure: …